what does sweetluv520j mean?

I always wish to experience romance and i always believed that there is sweet love. 520 means "i love you" in manderian and J represents him. Of course things dun turn out great and i easily get pissed off about him.... but i always try hard to not show that it bothers me when im around my friends or if im close to him. I dun want pplz to worry about me. BUT he pisses me off a lot! He is so insenstitve......its like he doesn't noe how i feel at all..can't he be more caring or at least show some affection? He tends to leave me hanging all the time. At first i thought i could deal with it but it was juz getting worse....like..i can feel myself growing to be more gloomy... -.- but y let this bother me? theres too much to worry about as a senior and i already have a lot to do. I noe he's busy and i am too.. i noe that we dun have the time to hang out or talk as much..theres nothing i can do about it....well i tried to be an understanding person..i tired.. -.- i was really mad today at the concert. like really mad... i started crying a lot when i get home. It was really hard to stop it from coming out when my dad drove me home. n i juz kept quiet... i have a friend that understands me a lot cuz he has a lot of experience about "relationships" n i complain alot to him lately... i feel that im getting annoying its like im repeating the same stuff over and over again.. i feel sowie for the ones i always bug. >.<>